Confessions of a shopaholic

I was doing so well. I would visit the malls and leave my credit card in the car. I would even go in with my credit card and not buy anything. Sometimes I would get as close as trying things on and walking out without a single purchase. I thought I was cured. And then summer hit. I had been working a couple more hours so my paychecks had increased. To the normal, money-saving mind, the excess funds would instantly be looked at as savings. Not to this mind though. I started looking at those extra dollars as a shopping allowance. For a while I set myself a limit each week of what I was allowed to spend on anything other than essentials. However, this quickly grew out of hand and each purchase was justified.

Blake tried to stop me. Ashlyn tried to stop me. My mom tried, but with no avail. I would think of things that I needed, like sunglasses. It's Arizona, it's hot, the sun is high in the sky 12 hours a day, sunglasses are a must! But of course none of my current sunglasses would suffice. Excuses began to accrue including things like too cheap, too tight on my nose, too big, too childish, doesn't match, I could make the list go on forever. This soon became my mind set. I remember this mindset from years ago when I was still living at my parents and had nothing to pay for except my phone bill. This meant my shopping budget was huge! I've learned to suppress the urge to shop by not going to shopping centers. However, I received several gift cards for my birthday in April and I had to use them. The people that gave them to me would have wanted that.

The first store I walked into instantly sparked the concealed urge to buy everything I saw. But I limited myself to the amount on the gift card. The 7-8 gift cards that all had at least $25-50 on them, were used within a couple days. I thought I would be ok, but I was not. After purchasing several shoes, dresses, blouses and shorts, I needed more. The smells of the new fabric and material sent me overboard. I was done for. No one could reason with me. The reason why I'm writing this is because I just checked my bank account and there are only a few dollars left in my checking account. Earlier this week there was over a $1000 and I had already paid for all my bills. I have a problem.

So... this is my confession. People always say, the first step to fixing a problem is to admit that you have one. I don't know where to go from here, but at least I know I have a problem. I've already taken half my stuff back to the stores, but it doesn't do anything for my urge to shop. So Blake is making me clean out my closet and sell my unwanted clothing to used name brand clothing stores because I need the money and I currently can't fit all of my clothing in my tiny closet.

Then maybe I'll have enough room and money to buy MORE clothes! =)